Monday, July 20, 2009

For clarity's sake.

I thought I should provide a little guide to not-watching things, just in case any of you were confused. There are many many techniques for not-watching, this is just a personal favorite of mine.

1.) Find something that is watchable, that is the only requirement, you don't have to worry about it being any good (it's actually easier if it isn't)
2.) set it up, as if in the sound belief that you will watch it, plump a nice pillow, adjust the volume, get comfortable....
3.) Attempt to synchronize your personal passage into sleep with the end of the intro credits.

There are many variations on this. two of my other favorites are identical up to step 3. simply replace that step with either "realize, if possible, suddenly, that you are late for the evining shift at work, leave." or "allow the forces of the universe to cause an emergency in the next room, a minor indoor flood or fire works well, proceed to act reasonable for such a situation."

with practice you can become an expert not-watcher like me.

No comments: